Sushma's Swaraj: The Joke's on India

Not to be derisive, but after witnessing Wednesday's rambunctious Lok Sabha session, one mustn't point fingers at our political class; they are giving the Indian populace exactly what they want - pure, no-holds-barred entertainment. To watch two of the most experienced parliamentary debaters in Sushma Swaraj and Arun Jaitley convincingly best the Gandhi family made for one epic treat/burn, which would even make a certain Goswami chuckle.


The Congress party could certainly function better as a more constructive Opposition but even despite Rahul Gandhi's buffoonery (See expert without knowledge), I do believe they did ask the right questions and Sushma should've put the Lalitgate matter to bed once and for all instead of being so obscurantist. Her pugnacious yet plain assertion that she'd "done nothing wrong" simply didn't lend credence to her stand.

Ever since her appointment as MEA, she has reached out to and provided humanitarian aid to many an Indian in distress and could have posited the same theory in defence of her assistance to Lalit Modi. But voila, she handed it back to the Gandhis in a language that they best understand: Accuse the accuser; turn defence into attack.

The fact of the matter is, allegations cannot be countered with more allegations. Two wrongs don’t make a right. Their scams vs our scandals, their secularism vs our nationalism, their riots vs ours, their absconders vs ours. Maybe that’s what Sushma means by “Quid pro quo”.

Every party has skeletons in its closet; none more so than the Congress, and that's probably why the Grand Old Party has been relegated to double-digit Opposition benches after ten years of misrule. Let's not forget, it was under the UPA's tenure that Lalit Modi turned 'fugitive'. Wednesday's session should not have been about what Rahul's दादी, मम्मी and पापा have done; Indians don't need any reminding. But reviving the ghosts of Congress' past provided the only egress out of the Lalitgate conundrum for the ruling party.

It's a tried and tested way - of circumventing salvos from both the Opposition and the fourth estate, which has been perfected by the powers that were, and which has been one-upped by their saffron successors.

Surely, it buys time but does little to indemnify our embattled Foreign Minister. It is clear the BJP will not force Sushma to step down, but the Lalitgate albatross shall continue to hang around her neck.

In a few hours from now, her belligerent visage will adorn the front page of every major paper. Social media will like and share snippets of her speech to death; news channels will use the same to maximise their TRPs. In a few days from now, the noise will die down. In a few weeks, all the tomfoolery will be forgotten. For as they say - public memory is notoriously short.

The joke’s on India.

India 2014: Varanasi's Roadshow Rut and the Road to Delhi

For the whole of last week, it seemed India's capital had shifted some 500 miles south east to the holy town of Varanasi. Nestled on the banks of the river Ganga, Varanasi - known locally as Kashi or Banaras, has become more than a just a town linked to the spirituality it bestows upon its visitors; it has become larger than life; for on May 12 it will bear witness to the most decisive political battle in this year's Lok Sabha elections.

Lenity would force observers into believing that the fight for the Varanasi seat is a three horse race (Uttar Pradesh's ruling Samajwadi Party (SP) isn't even in the running). This is indeed music to the ears of his detractors, but they may have to concede that Bharatiya Janata Party's (BJP) PM-candidate Narendra Modi is the frontrunner to wrest the key constituency. Other claimants for Varanasi include the Aam Aadmi Party's (AAP) Arvind Kejriwal, whose short-lived stint as Chief Minister of Delhi was seen as utterly tumultuous and a betrayal of those who voted for him; and the Congress's lesser known candidate Ajay Rai, who built his chequered career as a BJP legislator before defecting to the former.

The 2014 election is touted to be 'the biggest' poll of its kind, not only because of the enormity of India's voting populace (estimated to be well over 800 million), but because come May 16, the world's largest democracy is likely to witness the proverbial and electoral decimation of the ruling Congress party.

The Congress, patronized and run by the Gandhi family for decades has had a vice-like grip on the nation's political and jugular vein. Modi, who's making his first foray into national politics, is widely expected to ride the eponymous wave of fervor and anti-incumbency and form India's next government.

Holding the Congress's last stand is the family’s diffident heir Rahul Gandhi, who has failed to sway the tide in his party's favor. When all hope was lost, he even went about influencing voters in poll booths during polling in his constituency Amethi, but was let off scot free by the Election Commission of India
(EC) even after several complaints were lodged in his name.

The EC's credibility as a neutral poll body came under fire when it rejected BJP's application for Modi to hold a rally in Varanasi's Benia Bagh, but granted his opponents including Kejriwal, Gandhi and Uttar Pradesh's Chief Minister Akhilesh Yadav permission to campaign at the same venue.

Making the most of what he could, Modi instead led a gargantuan roadshow from the Kashi's prestigious Banaras Hindu University (BHU) to the party's headquarters in the city. The three mile stretch took more than four hours to cover, as hordes of supporters and townsfolk thronged the streets to catch a rare glimpse of a man who could very well be India's next Prime Minister. Beyond doubt, Modi's procession made a greater impact than a rally ever would have. Such was its success that it forced his political rivals to stage roadshows of their own.

"If Modi comes, can Kejriwal be far behind?" asks one observer, who witnessed all the other Modi-induced rallies. Kejriwal indeed wasn't far behind. A day after Modi came and conquered Kashi, "Kejriwal was met with many supporters, but this didn't seem quite different to his protest rallies and his dharna," he adds. Only a few months ago, Kejriwal graduated from full time agitator to bit-part politician to unsettled administrator. His party has come of age a little too quickly, but it seems it hasn't quite shaken off its cantankerous side.

Only days earlier, Modi addressed a massive rally in the Gandhi’s bastion Amethi, which came as an alarm to the first family. It didn't come as much of a surprise when Gandhi returned Modi's favor, showing up with his own motorcade in Varanasi in a relatively meek show of strength. Much to the former’s dismay, not only was his Kashi rally dwarfed by Modi's, he had to deal with a rival procession a few miles away from his own – Akhilesh Yadav's. Yadav's rally had no real purpose behind it, except perhaps, to avoid a loss of face in the state he has sloppily ruled.

As has become quite fashionable this election, all three men went all guns blazing on Modi. What they didn't realize however is that, in an attempt to emulate Modi and throw dirt on him, they have actually played into his hands. Not only is Modi expected to win a majority of the Hindu vote (Hindus comprise 85% of Varanasi's population); the close contest between the other parties will ensure that the minority vote is split between the three. Modi couldn’t ask for more.

In all honesty, the Varanasi roadshow rut was unnecessary yet exuberant. For once, it did illuminate the 'City of Lights'; probably like never before, or after.